Let me clarify something right off the bat; I do not suffer from chronic illness myself. Hence why this is more of a how to care for your friends who have it, rather than what to expect of others if you have it.
I get upset when people get cocky and condescending with my friends who cannot help the condition their body is in. I know these people just don’t understand, but telling someone to “just get up and do something“ when their entire body screams in pain is not the way to go at all! Just because the pain isn’t a gaping, bleeding wound for you to see doesn’t mean it’s not there, NOR that it’s not a valid physical pain.
I count myself very, very lucky to be healthy enough to get up every morning and go about my day, and it’s depressing to even myself that it took until I met a dear friend of mine who suffers from chronic illness to realize it. To appreciate it fully. Please, please, be grateful you are able bodied (to varying degrees) and do not coerce those who talk about their pain into doing the things YOU think they SHOULD be able to do.
If someone talks about their pain on their blog, try not to see it as enabling. There will always be people who fake being sick, and maybe the extra info they gather will help them fake better, but there is also a chance someone else who suffers in silence will see those posts and realize that maybe, they too suffer from this illness people talk so little about. And this is what is important.
Last but not least— I wish I could give you some of my spoons, AJ ;v;
thank you for making this, oh my god.
I’ve made the mistake that the latter choice has more than once, even as a person who lives with chronic pain everyday. Sometimes it’s hard to understand how harmful your words can be when you constantly demand attention. Personally, I’m trying to be better about it, more mature. Because your friends health needs to come first.
I have a friend who developed her chronic illness in the time I knew her (we’ve known each other for closing on ten years) and it’s been absolutely heartbreaking to watch. It’s made the time we can spend together all the more precious.